Slutgirl was hired at the bank about two years ago. My first impression was that she was a bitch. This is neither a lie nor a joke. I really thought she was a bitch. I've told her this several times. I wasn't wrong. She is a bitch. If you add that to the fact that she is white trash then you've got a winning combination. She freely admits both of these so I'm not bashing my friends. I'm just merely stating the facts.

Slutgirl had just recently gotten married to her husband shortly before starting to work with us. She had already been with him for several years and had two children with him so the logical thing seemed to be to get married. Slutgirl's husband, whom we'll call Dr. Doom, is a sheriff.

As I got to know Slutgirl, I learned that Dr. Doom had a little problem...... PREMATURE EJACULATION. Dr. Doom isn't a young man. He's in his late 40's. He should have outgrown that shit in his late teens. It seems that he couldn't last more than two minutes at the most. That would be be just enough to piss me off. Just when you start to get into it, he blows his load??????? Hell no! I'd be telling him to get down here and finish the job right.

Slutgirl found a way around his little problem.....Dr. Doom's best friend who is also a sheriff. That's right. If you're going to fuck around on someone, do it right. Fuck their best friend. The only real problem is that I might be a little scared fucking around on someone that carries a gun for a living.

This is the point where I should add that Slutgirl started this affair about two months after getting married. Basically, during the entire marriage, Dr. Doom's best friend was hitting it far more than he was. Oh.....The best friend is also married. They used to go out on double dates frequently. That had to be awkward.

If you're wondering, Slutgirl is in the middle of a divorce right now. She is currently living in their house with the children, drawing unemployment, while Dr. Doom is living with his mother. Dr. Doom has been ordered to pay all of the household bills until the divorce is final.

Believe it or not, the affair did not end the marriage. They separated in October. Slutgirl just told him about the affair three months ago. That's when she finally decided to end the affair. I guess that he's no longer fuckable since he's no longer her husband's best friend. The excitement's just not there anymore.

There's so much more to this story that I still haven't been given the okay to tell. But I believe that you can see why I call her white trash. If you're wondering why I call him Dr. Doom, there is a reason. We went to Universal Studios in the fall of last year. There's a ride there called Dr. Doom's free fall. It shoots you up fast, you get three bounces and then you come down. It just seemed fitting. You get three pumps and then you're done.

Now on to the good stuff. The new Godsmack album came out. Godsmack IV. Holy shit. I love it. Here's my new obsession.


Godsmack
Shine Down