Dirty Blonde

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Closing Time

Last night is the reason that I will never volunteer to close again. I had a date after work so at first I balked at the idea of closing the branch. Being the closing manager, it would be my responsibility to make sure that everything is complete before I can leave. If any problems arise, I am the one responsible for fixing them. Well......We had major fucking problems last night.

THE PSYCHO

First, we had a psycho come into the branch right at closing time. He went to a teller and told her that he had fraud on his account. He shows her his license and proceeds to tells her that the signature on it is fake. The license is completely valid, only the signature is fake. Florida licenses are not embossed cards. They are more like a credit card. It's almost impossible to fake a signature on the card. The man is saying that it is the original license however someone changed the signature. (BTW- The signatures were almost identical.) He then tells us that he needs to go over his account but he doesn't have time s he will just get some travelers checks. Eight fucking thousand dollars worth of travelers checks. Considering that each individual check must be recorded and signed, this would take about an hour. Also, we already had them balanced and put up for the night. After about 30 minutes of convincing him why he shouldn't get travelers checks but rather an official check, he finally agrees. He wanted the checks so that he could pay bills with them. We kept telling him that they were for merchants only. You can't send a travelers check to the electric company to pay your bill.

THE FINALE

Here's where it gets good. Vic asks for my keys so that he can go into the vault and get an official check for the psycho. The checks were also balanced and put away but they are much easier to balance again. I think I should mention that all the other keys were locked away and I had the only remaining key to the vault.

After waiting about five minutes, I went to see where Vic was. He was standing next to the vault door. Here's what went down.
Me: Vic, where's my keys?
Vic: I left them in the vault but Joan's in there.
Amy: No she's not. I just saw her walk over there.
***** Joan comes walking over*****
Vic: Who shut the vault door?
Joan: I did. DJ said there was still a customer(the psycho) in the bank.

Basically, they locked the only keys to the bank in the fucking vault. I can't leave the bank because I can't lock the doors when I leave. I had the only key.

The vault has 2 doors to the entrance. The first is the main door that can only be locked and unlocked by combination. That door had not been shut yet. The second door is a gate. It's a glass door with a small opening on the top and on the bottom. Suddenly, everyone is trying to squeeze under the bottom of the door. We call Judy over because she's the smallest person there. She's about 5'1" and weights about 90lbs but she couldn't squeeze under the door. At that point I gave up. I went to my computer to look up the branch manager's cell number. He had just left about twenty minutes prior. I walked back around and saw DJ standing on a chair holding Judy by her feet over the top of the door. She was hanging upside down reaching for the door handle. I though I was going to have a fucking heart attack. I started yelling "You're going to fuckin' drop her!" I suddenly had a vision of her falling headfirst on the ground and getting knocked out.....behind a locked door.

Judy reached the handle and unlocked the door. I got my keys back and all was well in bankland. However, I will never let anyone touch my keys again.

Posted by drunkbh :: 7:56:00 AM :: 24 comments