Dirty Blonde

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Don't park behind me!

I would like to start out by saying that I am a very careful driver. I will never sideswipe you or plow into you. I don't tailgate. I don't speed excessively. This doesn't mean that I'm one of those idiots that like to go right at the speed limit or a little below. I prefer to go about 10 to 20 miles over it depending on the flow of traffic. I just seem to have one problem driving. I can't back up. I have been in 4 car accidents and 3 of them have been with a parked car...or dumpster.

1- It all started when I was about 10 or 11. My grandfather asked my brother and I to take the trash to the dumpster. This involved moving the truck from one end of the parking lot to the other. It seemed simple enough. My brother got to make the first round. He managed to get the truck there successfully. When my turn came, all I had to do was back up the truck away from the dumpster and pull back into a parking space. I did great for about the first 4 or 5 feet. Then I heard a grinding sound. It seems that when backing away from something that you are parked close to, you shouldn't turn the wheel too soon. I took out the entire side panel of the truck. Luckily, my grandfather had a good sense of humor. He sat and watched the entire thing laughing while I got out of the truck crying. My mother wasn't quite as humored by the situation.

2-Flash forward 10 or 11 years. My best friend and I decided to throw a bash for her upcoming birthday. Actually, I'm not sure if it was for her birthday or we just wanted to party. We were up till around 6am. I woke the next afternoon feeling like shit and hardly any time to get to work. I rushed to my car and proceeded to haul ass to work. I made it about 10 feet. That's about how far it look me to take out the entire side of her car. I had to go inside and wake her up on her birthday to tell her what had happened. She actually didn't seem that upset. Luckily somebody sideswiped her the next month. We blamed all the damage on that person so I got away with accident #2 unscathed.

3-We can go forward another 8 years for accident #3. I had already moved to Florida by then and had just started a new job. I had just seen a loved one killed in an auto accident. It made me a little apprehensive behind the wheel. I was amazed at what can happen to a car in a low spped crash. I started looking up crash test results. It wasn't looking so good for my car. I was driving in a death wagon. I ended up buying a mid-size SUV based purely on the crash test results. This was a big mistake. It took me an entire week to crash....7 days. I was at work and leaving to go home to catch a bite to eat for lunch. I backed out turning my wheel hard to the right. I actually almost made it. I clipped the bumper of my manager's brand new SUV. I should state that we had several levels of management. I hit the top dog who should have been of that day but just stopped by for something. I wasn't as fortunate that time around. I had to pay for her car and my car to be fixed. By the way, it was a little embarrassing driving around with temporary plates and a dented in bumper.

For the record, I have been accident free for 4 years now...just don't park behind me. Accident #4, the one not with a parked car, was not my fault just in case you were wondering.

Posted by drunkbh :: 8:08:00 PM :: 8 comments